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Okay, I’m a trespasser. An interloper. Snoop with a lens. 

I wander around old barns and factories. I peek into empty houses and under stadium bleachers. I investigate train tracks, dead end roads, and construction sites. I’ll poke around any place that looks interesting. That’s trespassing, you say. I call it a photo opportunity. 

It’s a victimless crime.

Really, I’m not a vandal, just a camera buff. I’m cautious and respectful when I trespass. Once in a while I get challenged but it usually ends well. It helps to look mostly harmless and be super apologetic when caught. 

 

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Car Buying

 

I bought a car recently. So I feel something akin to a crime victim. Ripped off and beaten.

I can think of nothing else in the American experience where the price you pay depends solely on the strength of your negotiating skills.

Think about it. What other purchase do you make where you’re subjected to the waterboarding effects of high pressure sales tactics? Real estate isn’t sold this way. High-end appliances aren’t heavily negotiated or subject to “clear coat” fees.

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I’ve got a car with lots of fancy but useless features. The car can park itself in case I’ve forgotten how, turn on the wiper blades in the event I don’t know it’s raining outside, and shut itself off should I neglect to push the huge red Off button on the dash. These features seem to be designed for people who aren’t real bright, and probably shouldn’t be driving anyway. 

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